Wild Manther » Manther Basics

Manther Basics: The Hunting Instinct

savagemanther — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 05:45:40 +0000

The Manther’s primeval hunting instinct is commonly misunderstood. Many make the reckless and cursory judgment that the Manther is simply a dirty old man. Such a shallow understanding of the Manther is an unfair impediment to properly understanding the great creature. What compels the Manther in his ceaseless prowl to capture and possess young women is something ultimately pure and noble. A fire that burns more brightly in him than in lesser men. A flame of enduring passion for the ideal female form. A futile drive to possess female beauty at its fleeting zenith. To behold the rarest orchid in full bloom.To capture the fragile firefly at its most brilliant. To ogle at boobs.

Nothing captures the spirit of this noble pursuit better than this musical work of inspired genius by Robert Lund “99 Words For Boobs”:

It’s sadly not featured, but our personal favorite is “Sweater Puppets”

Manther Basics: This One’s for the Ladies…..

Wild Manther — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 12:39:00 +0000

We have endeavored to peel back the silken sheet of the Manther’s world, but have so far ignored the Pinot Grigio-glazed view from the eyes of his young prey. It has long been theorized that the Manther hunts by overcoming his unwary prey with a blistering arsenal of seductive trickery. But perhaps Manther mating behavior is more nuanced than sheer predation. Perhaps the prey herself is sometimes an active participant in the musky ritual. Perhaps a certain subset of canny young women wade willingly, even purposefully, into that houseboat’s frothy jacuzzi waters. But even if they don’t, here are some reasons they should:

50 Reasons Why Young Women Should Date Older Men

One of the most convincing reasons, in our opinion, is #41: He won’t ask you a bunch of personal questions, like “What’s your name?”.

P.S. Don’t miss out on the hours of entertainment that you can enjoy from reading the comments. This one happens to be our favorite:

Aaron Goldsberry Says:
June 24th, 2007 at 1:59 pm

Hilarious! Younger women are flocking to us older guys and it’s a blast! I love them, because they’re bright, vivacious and eager to learn about the world around them. I find older single women in this country to be bitter, over-opinionated, pushy and selfish! They’re know-it-all’s with bad attitudes and lousy plastic surgery. When I date these young gals, I feel like a teacher, a lover and a father figure all in one and it’s both a physical and emotional turn-on. I’m 50, and I have more hot young 30-somethings vying for my attention than I can handle. I divorced a shriveled old bag who was 50 and fading fast, and now I have several young babes in dating rotation. It makes me feel younger too. All I can say is life is good! Great posting. I can’t wait to read your blog because you’re funny as hell!

Manther Basics: Manther Long And Prosper

Wild Manther — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 12:27:00 +0000

Every true Manther knows that a tumble in the silk sheets with a pert young professional dancer makes you feel like you can live forever. What he might not know is that, if done frequently enough, it very well just might.

“It turns out that older men chasing younger women contributes to human longevity and survival of the species, according to new findings by researchers at Stanford and the University of California-Santa Barbara.”

Next time you scowl at a passing convertible jaguar with gray hair flying out of the top and long, young legs splayed out of the passenger side, just remember the sacrifice he’s making for the survival of the species.

Follow the link below to read the results of this fascinating study in full:

Old Men Chasing Young Women: A Good Thing

Be proud you noble, selfless Manther, be proud.

Manther Basics: Manther MD

Wild Manther — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 10:33:00 +0000

Every parent dreams that their daughter will grow up to meet a nice, respectable man – like a doctor. But within the medical community prowls a beast with the power to surgically transform that dream into a nightmare. A beast for which every sexual encounter is an out-patient procedure: The Manther MD.

The Manther MD holds hearts in the palm of his hand. His white smock commands a level of authority that few uniforms can ever achieve, and inspires the unconditional trust that fuels this Manther’s mojo. What other man do women unflinchingly don open-backed paper robes for? “You want me to open my mouth wide so you can tickle my tonsils? No problem doctor.” “Breast exam? Of course, Doctor, I want to be on the safe side.” And his trusty pager provides a surefire way out of any uncomfortable post-seduction situation: “Darling I wish I could stay, but I’m needed at the hospital. There are lives that need saving.”

There is incredible variation within the Manther MD species. Dr. 90210 and his brethren who specialize in the more “elective” procedures, for example, rank at the top of the hierarchy due to their unrestricted access to female body parts, and the noble service they perform for the Manther community - helping sub-standard women reach a level of Barbie-like perfection, normally funded by and solely for the enjoyment of a fellow Manther. “Sweet little kitten, did you order a pair of duck lips with a side of anal bleaching? My pleasure.” This sub-species of Manther is always pushing the concept of female beauty to its limits, a trailblazer on a mission to turn every 6 into a 10. If only we all had such ambition. “Let’s feel how those big beautiful new breasts are healing shall we?”

Another subspecies worth mentioning is what we like to call the “rogue” Manther MD, as embodied by the famous Dr. House. This one doesn’t play by the rules, my friends, which makes him that much more desireable to naive young women looking to rebel against their over-bearing parents. A medical genius with a heart of gold and a prickly exterior, the “rogue” is a master of complexity, always keeping his prey hopelessly off-balance. He exudes competence and intensity. He emanates mystery through his perfectly disheveled stubbly facial hair. He can replace your liver with a toaster, scream at you until you cry, then lull you into his bed with a Mozart sonata. When lives are on the line, broken hearts are the least of his concerns. He’s as unpredictable as any wild creature, but yet he’s also another beautiful shade of musk in the Manther rainbow.

Paging Dr. Rosenpenis……..

Manther Basics: “A Day in the Life Of A Manther”

Wild Manther — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 08:45:00 +0000

Studying the Manther in all of his glory is like staring at a Renoir. From far away, he is clearly a masterpiece, yet the understanding is superficial. Take a closer look at this stunning species, and myriad intricacies spring to life, overwhelming your senses.

In our ongoing examination of the Manther in his native habitats, we have only begun to piece together his many characteristics. He is as elusive as he is majestic, rendering it nearly impossible to capture his essence but for a fleeting moment. Through our many years of scientific study however, we’ve collected enough empirical evidence to recreate a day in the life of Manther. The following is a dramatization…

**Please note that the many of the items worn in the reenactment can be purchased in our online store**

11:15 a.m. The Morning Hour: This is a time for reflection. A time to savor the succulent memories of last night’s passion, to ponder the natural beauty that surrounds the Manther Den. It is in this state that the Manther is at his most vulnerable and therefore the most difficult moment in which to capture him.

*Our Manther model is wearing our basic white boxers – no funny stuff! – and sipping French Roast from a large mug, both emblazoned with the Mather Crest and available in our online store.

12:00 p.m. Tidying The Den: A Manther’s Den must be kept in a state of maximum seductiveness, which means never leaving evidence of past kills. An essential part of each morning is a thorough inspection of the Den, with special attention paid to the hot tub, pool, shower, leather couch, bedroom, and pool table. Dainty thong underwear is literally designed to slip into cracks and crannies, sliding between cushions and clogging pool filters. Therefore careful maintenance is absolutely necessary to ensure that the next little minx he drags home will not encounter any unsavory items. “Where, oh where, did I leave my leopard bikini….”

*our model is wearing our manly sleeveless t-shirt, embellished with our cursive logo. This t-shirt is great for chores as it allows for freedom of movement (and goes well with pajama pants). Available in our online store.

12:30 p.m. Moment of Zen: Nothing clears the conscience after long sordid night (as well as tones the upper body) like Karate. This ancient practice is believed to cleanse the mind and body of any lingering detritus. In the Manther’s case, sweat that smells like Courvoisier and Stetson. These few precious moments are when the Manther gathers his Chi, restores his manly vigor, and connects to his primal state, readying himself for the hunt that lies ahead.

*Our model is wearing our manly sleeveless t-shirt. Japanese Kimono Robe not available in stores.

2:30 Recreation: All work and no play is NOT what the doctor ordered. A Manther must cultivate his playful side through various types of leisurely recreation, such as yachting, golf, skeet shooting, chess, or cigar collecting. A Manther’s many gentlemanly hobbies reinforce his well-rounded charm and provide plenty of excellent material for interesting conversation, i.e. diversion. A Manther in his natural habitat may pursue a surprising variety of non-sexual extracurricular interests with a passion almost equal to that displayed on the hunt.

*Our model is wearing our dashing Manther-Crest Polo shirt. This shirt boasts versatility, elegance, and sophistication. Available in our online store.

4:30 p.m. Learning: The Manther’s mind is thirsty for knowledge and constantly striving for perfection. The increase in competition, due to globalization, has had a rather Darwinian effect on lazy Manthers. To maintain his dominance, the Manther must stay on top of the latest hunting techniques. He spends 1 – 2 hours per day on the learning process, which can include reading, journaling, surfing the web, and watching Magnum P.I.

*Our model is wearing our playful Yellow “Manther Man” t-shirt. As you can see, the design is incredibly versatile and can be worn with anything from a tweed blazer to dolphin shorts. Mandals not available in our online store….sorry.

5:30 p.m. Preparation: As the day winds down and sunset cocktail hour approaches, the Manther must get himself in the hunting mood. This usually entails trying on new wardrobe items, snacking on gourmet hors d’hoeuvres , or frolicking around his Manther Den. It is his last carefree moment before he must cultivate a laser-like focus on the night’s work.

*Our model is wearing the sporty Manther Crest Polo from our online store, demonstrating yet another use as a more casual wardrobe item.

A Celebration of Independence

Wild Manther — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:38:00 +0000

The concept of independence is the crux of the Manther philosophy, or kaizen, as they say. Our forefathers risked life and limb to fight for our freedom from the old British Cougar Queen, many years ago. On this July 4th, we give thanks for the freedom that was gained, for the rights we were given…..the inalienable right to drive your lime-green Lambo through the hills of Malibu, with a 22 year old aspiring actress by your side, and Kenny Logins blasting on the stereo, for example. It is a moment to stop and wonder, what if Kim Jung Il, clad in his signature, boxy zip-up military jacket and Ray-Bans, invaded our shores and eradicated the entire Manther population out of sheer jealousy???? A thought too horrific to bear.
On this Friday, July 4th, wear your stars and stripes with pride, Manther-hunters. Taste the freedom – the salty, silky, musky freedom – that Manthers savor on a daily basis. And ready your cameras………..

Manther Basics: Manther Cubs

Wild Manther — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:21:00 +0000

Thanks to Bruce in Marina del Rey, we have captured a shot of a Manther Cub, or Manther-In-Training. Identifying marks can include but are not limited to: the glistening of a fresh Mystic Tan, unruly and ill-groomed chest hair, a signature gold chain, and/or a distinct lack of finesse in conversation.
Unlike the mature Manther, who tends to hunt alone, Manther Cubs can often be found in packs, sharpening their skills and observing each others’ techniques. Indigenous to many of the same areas as the mature Manther, the Manther Cub is known for keeping his distance from the older dominant male for fear of being ostracized, or even worse, “wallet whipped”, in front of potential prey (ahem….Mastros). A little known fact about the Manther Cub is their vulnerability to Cougars. Until Manther Cubs have cultivated a fully developed disdain for their Cougar nemeses, they are in constant danger of succumbing to their fatal mini-skirt, Cosmo, and mottled cleavage combo.
Ladies be warned: the personal den of a Manther Cub will almost always be massively disappointing and non-sexy. A clear illustration of that warning in this photo is the shriveled houseplant protruding from our Manther Cub’s back. That being said, Manther Cubs can be as playful and confident as their older, more seasoned counterparts. More importantly, they have a dream that we can all respect……the dream of being Manther.

Manther Basics: The Definition Of A Manther

Wild Manther — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 13:05:00 +0000

In short, a Manther is an older male bachelor who pursues young women for frivolous sexual encounters. But reducing this great and fabled beast to such a trite definition is to deny the grand tradition, rich culture and vast biodiversity of the species. The Manther has stalked the land since long befor the Cougar, since the first silvery-haired ape kicked his mate to the curb for one with less saggy teats. He has prowled the bar for centuries with pungent cologne and a bulging money bag. He has stalked his nubile prey with fang-sharp style and predatory wiles gained from decades on the hunt. This blog is a homage to this majestic beast, and an ambitious attempt to capture his essence. So read on and watch as the Manther takes shape before your very eyes.

An early artisitic rendering of the Manther. Notice the powerful flanks, regal coifed mane and hungry eyes.

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